Learning to Notice: How Babies Communicate Before Words

Why learning to notice baby cues can change the parent–baby relationship

One of the most common experiences in early parenthood is trying to understand what a baby needs before they can speak. For many new parents, this can feel uncertain at first. Every cry, movement, or change in expression can seem like something to decode. For parents welcoming another child, there can be a different realization: even when you have done this before, each baby communicates in their own unique way.

Most parents know that babies cry to communicate. But babies are communicating long before words in many other ways too. Their colour, gaze, body movements, facial expressions, changes in breathing, and the way they settle, or become unsettled, are all part of their early language.

Learning to notice and decipher these cues can transform the parent-baby relationship.

From birth, babies are active participants in interaction. They may turn toward a familiar voice, often showing a preference for their mother’s voice, look away when they need a break, stretch their body when alert, or bring their hands to their mouth to self-soothe. These behaviours are not random. They are ways babies express how they are experiencing the world and what they may need in that moment.

For a first-time parent, noticing these signals can bring reassurance. It can help shift the experience from “trying to get it right” to gradually learning the baby’s individual patterns. Understanding develops over time through observation, closeness, and repeated interaction.

For parents who are caring for another baby, there can sometimes be an expectation that previous experience will make everything familiar. Yet many parents discover that each child has their own temperament and style of communication. One baby may seek eye contact often, while another may become easily overstimulated and look away. One may settle best through touch, while another responds more to voice or movement. This is why learning to notice matters. It reminds us that communication begins in relationship, and that every baby brings their own way of connecting.

The Newborn Behavioural Observations System highlights this beautifully by encouraging parents and professionals to observe newborn behaviour closely. It shows that babies are not passive recipients of care; they are already communicating through their cues, inviting adults to respond.

When caregivers notice and respond to these signals, babies begin to feel understood. Over time, these small moments of being seen and soothed support trust, attachment, and emotional development. Parents often become more confident as they realize they are learning their baby’s language, not perfectly, but through connection.

Importantly, early communication is not one-sided. The parent-baby relationship is a two-way relationship, shaped by both the baby and the caregiver. As parents begin to notice and respond to their baby’s cues, they often feel more confident, connected, and emotionally attuned. Recognizing that a baby is actively communicating can help parents feel that their responses matter, strengthening the sense of connection that grows between them.

Perhaps this is one of the most important reminders for early parenthood: babies are communicating from the very beginning. And when we become curious enough to notice, we begin not only to understand them better, but also to deepen the relationship that supports their earliest emotional wellbeing.

Writing this article was inspired by my recent learning in the Newborn Behavioural Observations System - Brazelton Centre UK, which deepened my appreciation of how much newborns communicate from the very start.

I’d love to hear your thoughts: How do you see early communication shaping the parent-baby relationship?

Author

Angelica Georghiades

Certified Parenting Coach | Infant Mental Health Advocate 

Angali Parent & Child - Nicosia, Cyprus